About Me

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Lincoln, Nebraska, United States
I'm an artist, mother, entrepreneur and advocate. I'm poly and pan. I have ADHD.

Tuesday, September 29, 2020

Confessions of a Teenage Drama Queen

 Bless me Father, for I have sinned. It's been 5 days since my last confession.




                Ummm...no. I don't actually do that. I mean, I do confess plenty of shit, mind you, but not to a priest (usually it's less of a confession and more of me just babbling away about the shit I did that day, or interesting things that may have happened...kinda like my posts here...). But on a more serious note, it HAS been 5 days since I last posted!

Let's see, what has been happening since last I posted...what was it, Thursday? Yep, Thursday.

     Uh Friday I didn't work. Well, I mean technically I did, but it was like rollover from Thursday, 'cause Thursday is an overnight shift. Well, til 3 am on Friday. But I don't count it as Friday, 'cause I didn't sleep yet. So I think I woke up before noon, but likely didn't get up til after noon. Then I would have picked up Geof from work. We introduced Tucker to the bicycle and running alongside it. We then introduced him to the cart and running alongside that. Then introduced him to climbing into and sitting in the cart. He did great, enjoyed it all, and had a blast. No negatives during that training, so a HUGE plus! Then we went shopping. Then Geof took Evelyn home to her dad's ('cause he lost a finger at work so can't drive for a while) and I don't recall what I did during that time. Maybe I rested. Anyway, we chilled the rest of that night 'cause I had to be up early the next morning.

Which, naturally, brings me to Saturday! I got up ungodly early after having slept surprisingly well. I went to work and worked way longer than I prefer. It was already getting dark when I headed back home. Once home, I started working on cutting some 1/4" plywood to fit the shape of the bicycle cart, since it needed reinforced for the planned journey. The reviews complained of the plastic it comes with not being sturdy enough, so we're going to screw the plywood and some carpet to the plastic to make it sturdier. I finished that and got it onto the cart, then slowly made my way upstairs to bed. 

I didn't sleep as well Saturday night, but still got up at the same time Sunday morning. I was more tired during my ride to work, but thankfully I didn't have to work as long. I left work at 3, stopped at Behind the Glass to chill with Nate (the owner) a while, then returned home when Geof finished his gaming at 5:30. We got ready, then, and headed out to the 84th street MoPac trailhead with the dogs. Geof wanted to take them both for about a mile run each. He started with Tucker (remember Tucker is extremely new to this). I received a call from Geof about 8 minutes later, or so, mentioning that he went down because Tucker decided to chase a dog they had to pass on the trail. Tucker decided to run across the path in front of Geof, who was going full-speed on the bike, and yanked the bike so Geof went down. Thankfully no broken bones, just some shredded fingers on his left hand and road-rash on his left shoulder, and a couple minor knee scrapes. So he came back to the car, we got Tucker buckled back up. Geof apologized to Gotham, as was appropriate. Then we headed back home, so I could take care of all the wounds. Once home, I got the dogs inside, took off all their gear, and left it on the floor while I rushed over to deal with Geof's owies. Once dealt with, cleaned up, bandaged up, etc...I walked into the hallway where the dogs were waiting. I discovered that Tucker had chewed the plastic clips to pieces on his and Gotham's harnesses. Yay. SO we ordered new harnesses for the dogs and full fingered bicycling gloves for Geof. Then we had dinner with my parents so Geof wouldn't have to make dinner (I don't make dinner).

Monday I didn't get up til about noon. I had to 'cause mom was giving away cuttings from her Pothos plant and I was the one who had to post the ad on Facebook 'cause mom is a total FB newb. Because I was the one arranging for people to pick up and shit, I got up, got ready, took dogs out, blah blah blah...and no one shows up at the time they're supposed to. 🀦🏻‍♀️ So I decide to ride Leila over to pick up Geof from work (he gets off @ 1:30 pm on Mondays). At 1, I get a text that someone is on their way to pick up a cutting. I check the time and figure they probably will arrive soon enough that I can still ride over to get Geof, so I say "OK" and keep prepping to go. I deal with the hand-off when they arrive, then continue to go pick up Geof. He didn't know I was going to get him, so I got to surprise him! I picked him up, we got home, then we had to cut up carpet for the cart. I cut up the carpet while Geof watched. He gave each carpet cutting a good wallop against a tree to get as much dust and dirt out of them as possible. We'll have to measure and trim and melt the edges of each to fit it to the cart, but we figured doing that later would be fine. Hopefully it will be enough traction for Tucker to get in and out of the cart without any issues while it's moving. Monday ended with me working, as usual.

Today has been a nothing day. I've done very little. I got up around noon. I changed Geof's bandages when he came home for lunch (he neglected to do so this morning because he was running late for work). And I've basically just chilled in bed since. I did work on my Gallery more, though, so that was at least a little bit of productivity! And I'm writing my blog finally! GO ME! I just high-fived myself in my head, because I decided I'm awesome. I don't know what, if anything, I'll do the rest of the evening. I do have to work again tonight, so I'll at least have to do that. Oh well. Ya'll are caught up again, which was the entire point of this, so one more accomplishment down!

Ooh! I just remembered the funny story of the day! 

-Confessions of a Teenage Drama Queen-

Evelyn: "I just finished my History test."

Geof: "How was it?"

Evelyn: "Torture."

(She got an A on the test)

And with that, I shall bid you adieu. 

May God give you pardon and peace, and I absolve you from your sins.

Thursday, September 24, 2020

Oooh, Doughnuts!

 Man, that last post was quite the mood, huh? 

I haven't been moving much the last few days, other than work, which is necessary. I have been working on my web page, though! It's been a lot of coding, which is NOT my favorite, but it's yielded some awesomeness! I'm super excited for how my gallery is finally coming together! 

So, I've NOT been moving much, because it's painful. Probably had a bit to do with my mood the other day. Yes, I do use pain meds. No, pain meds don't make all the pain go away. Things are still very sensitive even today, but it's getting better. 

My dreams last night were very coding-related. Not the worst nightmares ever, mind you, but still not pleasant dreams. I really just don't like coding. It is a necessary part of building a web page, though, when you can't afford to pay someone else to do it. I managed to get it all to match the blog, so it all kind of flows, which is neat!

I started looking at other web page hosting sites. The one I'm currently using is free and fully customize-able because it's my dad's. I don't know that it will handle high traffic, though, and I know it isn't considered "safe" so I can't have embedded content on it yet, only links. It's not the worst, but it isn't really ideal. I don't know if we can afford, yet, to add another monthly payment to our ever-growing out-flow of finances, though. It may just have to wait a while, yet.  

I started looking at Twitch again today. I created an account a while back and have left it dormant so far. I'm not really sure how to go about using it, so I'm reading the stuff they have that's supposed to help with that. I feel really dumb when I'm on video. I despise the sound of my own voice when it's recorded. I don't know how I'm going to get past all that, but I think I'm ultimately going to have to, 'cause growing an art business without people who really love your art, seems pretty impossible. 

The other day, I started talking more with Geof about needing a business partner. He said he'd be that, but if Draw Me With Passion is going to thrive, I really need to find someone who wants it to thrive as bad as I do. Someone that also is good at all the business-y things I'm NOT good at. My executive functioning skills are next to nothing, and it shows. 

I couldn't sleep last night. I tried, but my brain wouldn't let me stop working on my gallery until nearly 3 am. I finally could lay down, then, but I still couldn't sleep! I was awake til after 6:30 this morning when Geof was getting up for work, finally (he kept turning his alarms off πŸ˜‚). After I finally fell asleep, my brain woke me up before 11 this morning because of the web page again. So work tonight is going to probably be a tad rough, unless by some miracle, I get a nap in. 

How does one go about finding, and connecting with, a great business partner? It's not as simple as putting out an ad. People don't want to be part of something that isn't going to have a financial return immediately, and starting up a business means waiting and working to get it to a place where it can support itself before it ever gets to a place where it can support you. We're talking years of work, generally. I mean, I know someone who I'd LOVE to have as a business partner, cuz they're super awesome, but an awesome friend isn't always the best choice for a business partner, right? I don't know..This whole thing is just more than I can think about for long, right now.

In different news, I keep double spacing after each sentence. Then I remember it's not necessary anymore and I fix it. Then I do it all over again. I learned to type on a real, and old, typewriter. It was a class I actually enjoyed. The teacher always pointed to things with her middle finger. She was really old! The whole class (there were like 5 of us, probably) would giggle every time. She always complemented my on my skill (can you say "ego boost"??). She said it probably had to do with the fact that I played piano. She was probably correct. Ah, check that out, a little more news for you about me, I can play the piano! I don't play, but I can. I have plenty of lessons under my belt. Somewhere between 7 and 9 years of them. I'm pretty sure there's at least parts of some songs that my fingers likely still remember.

I, literally, just now remembered that I have a coupon to Hurts Doughnut Shop! Now I want a doughnut...

I guess that ends this blog post! I'm going to go ride Leila over to the doughnut shop! If that's not a good reason for a ride and a smile, I don't know what is! πŸ’›πŸ’›

Monday, September 21, 2020

Bloody Fucking Hell

Fuck the female reproductive system. Fuck white supremacist assholes. Fuck all the people who can't see past their own fucking noses to care about someone other than themselves. Fuck stupid bowels. Fuck the stuckupbastardabusivepaidoffbybigbuisnesscaresnothingforthepeopleusagovernment. Fuck politics. Fuck the stupidfuckingpandemic. Fuck not sleeping. Fuck people who vote for fools...allthefuckingpeople! It's fucking time for women to run the fucking world. Strong women. Women who care about PEOPLE over big business. Women who can't be bought. It's time for a revolution. Our government is not worth keeping in its current state. Scrap it and start the fuck over. Fuck stupid work. Fuck headaches. Fuck cramps. Fuck pain. Fuck all the things. Fuck fucking every stupid fucking thing. Fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck!!





That is all.

Find a reason to smile!

 Yesterday was terrible. Today doesn't seem to be starting out that great either, and it's only 8 am.

Yesterday was terrible only because I was going on next-to-no-sleep. I really have no idea how much sleep I got, only that I put my phone away after 3 am and still didn't fall asleep any time soon; then I woke up at 5 am. My body wasn't ready, I dozed back off and woke again 10 minutes later. I forced myself to get up, then, so I wouldn't accidentally end up late for work, 'cause it was a distinct possibility at that point. I left a tad earlier than usual to make sure I had plenty of time to ride to work slower than speed limit, which was good, 'cause it was pretty cold and my fingers didn't like me riding faster than about 45 mph. The ride is always nice, so no complaints there. Chilly fingers are nothing when riding is an option. 😊 Work went fine. I didn't do much. I DID forget my Keens, which sucked, 'cause my riding boots are NOT made for walking, and walking happens a LOT at work. I walked very slowly to compensate (I walk pretty slowly anyway, my body doesn't much care for walking regardless). 

There was a big event on campus, and way too many people around. 2 extra staff were on duty, so I had people in and out of the office the entire shift. This wouldn't have been an issue, but I live in the same house (different domicile) as my parents, and am in consistent contact with them. My father has breathing troubles and we're in the middle of a pandemic that hits people harder when they're over 60 and/or have pre-existing conditions which could make the disease worse. My father meets both of those criteria. And these people, who are supposed to be wearing masks because it says so all over the damn campus (and because we're in the middle of a fucking pandemic!), are refusing to wear their masks whenever they're in the office. None take a hint from me, who not only wears the mask constantly, but ensures it's extra tight fitting anytime they walk in without a mask on. None ask if I'm comfortable with them wandering in close proximity to me without a mask on, while I'm obviously not comfortable with it. It's so frustrating!  Oh, and all this shit AFTER a conversation with one of them, earlier this SAME MORNING, about faculty, staff and students on campus NOT WEARING THEIR MASKS (at all or properly) AND HOW FUCKING FRUSTRATING IT IS! WHATtheACTUALFUCK?! And I can't take out this frustration toward THEIR boss (we have different bosses, because I'm just a contract worker), because HE was doing the SAME THING the other day! UGH!!! I just want to scream. Sigh...

So I finished work, told my boss my frustrations, she said she'd talk to their boss about my concerns (She, thank god, got the hint that I need people wearing masks around me at all times and has made sure to do so almost all the time).

People in America, right now, have made wearing a mask into a political thing. For me, it's because I don't want my father to die (Yes, I could die too, along with anyone in my household, but HIS risk is highest). How can people politicize something so base? How can a desire to live instead of die, or to keep one's own family alive, so easily become so controversial? 

I have a friend who currently lives in Canada, and he has expressed to me an opinion shared by so much of the world right now. America is a laughing-stock. As well it should be, at this point. We've allowed a fool to sit as president, and it's beginning to look like it will happen for another 4 years. Thank GOD we have a limit in place to keep it from being longer than that. We've allowed ourselves to become so divided that we can't agree on something as simple as keeping ourselves and our families alive in the midst of a pandemic. We've allowed ourselves to continue to be a nation divided by race, color, gender, and financial status. We've allowed our government to treat "illegal aliens" as animals. I found out recently that ICE has been spaying women in containment camps. Yes, spaying. Removal of the uterus, WITHOUT CONSENT! I cannot have that procedure done WITH my own consent, UNLESS I meet all sorts of prerequisites, BUT it's OK for ICE to do it without consent to women in containment camps who are not citizens. What is wrong with people?! We are so fucked...Oh, and we don't only spay them, we take their children away from them to be given to American families, or to be trafficked in our "child welfare" system. Yes, trafficked. The foster care system is inundated with child TRAFFICKING. As a society, can we get much worse? #AmericaTheDevastated #PeopleAreJustAnimals 

Sorry, I got off track. I was focusing on me, and my struggles and got distracted with caring about other people for a moment. How un-American of me. #UNAMERICAN

Let's get back to me now. 

I rode Leila home, managed to do so without being too drowsy. Drowsy is EXTREMELY dangerous on motorcycle. I had to force myself to be extremely vigilant any time I felt the least distracted. Which only made the feeling tired worse when I finally got home. I took my gloves and helmet off and bent over to rest my head on Leila for a moment. Exhaustion, man...ugh. I got all my shit off Leila and into the house just as Geof was bringing the dogs out to go potty. He took Gotham out off leash, so I made sure to assist to get him back inside quickly, then I went upstairs, had to use the toilet (all the icky info included in my blog, oops...), and when FINALLY I finished, I climbed into bed and just fell asleep. No idea what time it was. I asked Geof last night, but I've since forgotten because ADHD (I'd like to just start calling it Attention Surplus Disorder, since that's what it really is, but ASD is already designated for Autism Spectrum Disorder, which actually shares a lot of the same symptoms with ADHD). I didn't wake up until Geof fed the dogs their dinner, maybe around 7 pm? It could have been later, I don't really remember. I know Geof went on a bike ride because I went to sleep. ANYWAY, Geof surprised me with dinner after feeding the dogs. 😍 And then a little later, he didn't make me take the dogs out (though I know he wanted to) and brought me ice cream!! So my day at least ENDED on a good note! Well, until after midnight when my legs and arms threw a fit and made sleeping difficult again...But we can hang onto that ending on a good note thing πŸ€£πŸ˜‚πŸ€£

And NOW Today! Today begins bloody hell week. This, as some of you maybe can imagine, is the week where my body gives me literal bloody hell! πŸ˜ƒ <--smiley face is total sarcasm) I began cramping and bleeding today. 2 bloody hell weeks ago (for anyone who does not comprehend how periods work, it's been a couple months since then) I neglected to medicate during the cramping phase and ended up in pretty severe pain afterward because of extremely sensitive uterus, abdomen, etc... HOPEFULLY medication will help keep the after-pain from being so severe. The fact that I can still feel the cramps after taking the meds is sign for concern, though, I think. 

The dogs were lying on the bed all chill together with me (while I'm awake!). I think this means Tucker is finally getting used to sharing a bedroom with us. Big positives for this guy. He's a rescue and we have no idea what his background is. We know only that he's extremely oral, wants to put his mouth on literally everything; and highly reactive, we will likely be working on this his entire life. Because he's reactive it's not safe to have him near strangers without a muzzle and cautions for people to mind their own, so we got a bright red harness with directions for others to not look at him, or give him any kind of attention. Tucker will probably be forever "in training" but he's so loving and cuddly and sweet! And we're glad to have been able to give him a loving home for the rest of his life. The fact that he's reactive means that we'll probably never be able to board him or leave him with family, which is why we're taking him with us on our Niobrara River trip. He'll get a LOT of time with Geof and lots of practice with traveling this way, though, which are all positives! Hopefully we'll eventually get to start taking BOTH boys with us on our adventures!

Ooh, it's 9:30 and the cramping is a lot less noticeable now. Maybe this meds thing will work...¿?¿?

Speaking of ¿?¿?¿?¿? Geof's new tires (Geof just got new tires) are Riddler brand. So he wants a sticker with the Riddler question marks. I told him that I want to design it 😊 (cuz, y'know, I'm an artist). I think it would be cooler to have a bunch of little question mark stickers instead of one sticker. I will have to run it by him when he gets home (if I remember. If I don't remember, he'll just have to notice it here when he finally reads my blog πŸ˜†).

I don't have plans for today, except work. Maybe I should make some art. I'll have to get up and move (more than just taking the dogs outside). Or maybe prepare an adventure for Wednesday's gaming session. If any of you have any (really GOOD) ideas, you are welcome to share them. Maybe I'll implement one or more into our game. Then maybe I'll remember to let ya'll know if I do! I never really know what I'll remember, so try not to get frustrated when I forget things like that. OR just remind me to share! I don't mind good-natured reminders. 

----- ----- ----- ADHD ----- ----- -----

Just heard some news which reminds me of some political crap I fucking HATE. I HATE that our government can be bought. Fuckingpissesmethefuckoffomg! That is all. 

----- ----- ----- ADHD ----- ----- -----

Maybe I should try to work on my web page. I kind of like the ideas of working on my web page or planning for gaming, cuz I don't really want to get up right now. Oh well, I'll leave ya'll for now. Maybe I'll write some more later today, but I think I need to focus on other things for a while. 

Do something fun today, and find a reason to smile!

Saturday, September 19, 2020

Happy Birthday, Geof!

Alright, I skipped a couple days, so I'll try to catch you up on what's been happening.

Thursday was my anniversary. I didn't remember until Wednesday that it was going to be, and I really didn't remember anyway cuz Geof told me and I was like, "It is? I didn't realize it was that close to your birthday." And he was like, "Yeah, that's why I can remember it!" So that's how that happened. So yeah, Thursday was my anniversary. My mom gave us a card from her and dad. It was funny. I will take photos for you.
Geof told me that mom had told him what the *coupon* said when she gave him the card, silly mommy. AND when we got downstairs for dinner that night, she made sure to point out that the roles would be reversed for Geof and myself πŸ™„.

It took us a while to figure out what we wanted for dinner, but we eventually settled on Buzzard Billy's. I decided I'd handle ordering and picking it up. When I called the order in I asked them to have it ready by 6-6:15, so the gal said it'd be ready by 6:15. I picked it up on time, got it all tied down on Leila, and rode it home. When we sat down to eat, some of the food was a tad less hot than preferable, which made me wonder if they prepped it too early... Oh well, a fun time was had by us all, regardless, and I was afforded the opportunity to taste gator for the second time in my life. I realized (as I pointed out to a friend earlier this evening) that it has less flavor than chicken, but the texture is nearly the same, so people often say it tastes like chicken, and they're basically correct. Chicken is a tad more flavorful, though. 

Friday I worked in the morning and didn't freeze on my ride there cuz I dressed appropriately this time. My ride home was nice, if a tad chilly. Then we went grocery shopping.

Today was Geof's birthday. I took the day off work and surprised him this morning when I finally told him. He was literally giddy! That made me super happy. I got up, took the dogs outside, then fed the pets before going back to bed, it was a great morning. We ended up sleeping til noon, then we got up, took dogs out again, I shaved Geof's head, he prepped his bike and went for a ride, I then went down and assisted mom with dinner prep. Mom already had the cake done when I got down there but was confused why it was all cracked on the top. I reminded her it didn't matter cuz frosting covers up all the oopses. We proceeded to prep dinner so it would have time to marinate. After we finished, while sitting in the living room just chilling, mom freaked. She practically jumped to her feet, which is kind of a feat when you're like 60, and grabbed the cake exclaiming that she might have just figured out what was wrong with the cake! We rushed to the kitchen, she pulled out a fork, took a bite, and with a horrified voice exclaimed, "I was right! I forgot the sugar!" She was about to throw the whole cake away! I laughed, of course, because it was funny, and I stopped her. I reminded her that Geof loves super bitter dark chocolate and probably would like it. She made me taste it even though I don't care for cake, especially with peanut butter frosting, and I didn't think it was really all that bad. Dad tasted it later and said he preferred it that way. And Geof got home right then so I made him taste it, and he loved it too, so we didn't waste a cake! Mom still insisted on making another, correctly this time, for herself and Evelyn. 

After Geof got home, he cooled off from his ride, got changed, then we went out to drive the bike route he plans to take out of town, to see what it was like and make sure it's acceptable. It took us nearly an hour to drive it, cuz parts were in dense foot traffic and then country roads, one of which was so terrible! Anyway, we made it through, then it took us 15 minutes to get home via the highways πŸ€£πŸ˜‚πŸ€£

Once home we had dinner, with wine. It was delicious! I so hate the way my brain gets with alcohol if I drink too much too fast, though. After dinner, I buzzed my hair, it feels amazing again, yay!! Took a bath, cut all my nails, and now I'm in bed ready to sleep. Got an early morning coming.

Good night my peoples! πŸ’›

Wednesday, September 16, 2020

The Stone of Returning

Today was game day. For anyone who regularly gets together with friends to play a game, you know this is always the best day.

We play Dungeons and Dragons. I, by happenstance, am the Dungeon Master (DM). Evelyn plays a centaur barbarian named Esmeray. Geof plays a half drow, half high elf rogue named Elvyl. We have two other awesome people who join us each game day. One plays a high elf ranger, the half brother of Elvyl, named Orren. The other plays a dwarf life cleric named Hrothgar.

Today we finished up the last of an adventure I kind of just threw together. I think everyone enjoyed the adventure, for the most part. Geof seems to be the snootiest of the party members, throwing out his complaints with the NPC characters whenever they come off to him in a way he dislikes. Often, along with fun, comes silly dramas caused by things maybe not going quite the expected way, or moving along at not quite the expected speed. I am a newb DM, you see, so I inevitably take far too long to figure things out, or have massive difficulty role-playing an NPC. Part of this is likely due to my lack of planning. I don't take time to plan out all the minutia of each NPC which could possibly interact with a character, so when I'm caught off guard, I get stumped. I'm also terrible at role-play, so I think role-play tends to be boring for everyone involved. 

Evelyn has proven to become excessively bored by any kind of minutia which does not pertain to combat. She will often get distracted by other things and become difficult to drag back to the conversation (since we've become forced to game together online instead of in person). In person, it's not so difficult, because she's present in body and can be snapped back to reality. This, of course, is an ADHD symptom. We've not yet had Evelyn diagnosed, but we hope to soon, so we can take advantage of all available forms of assistance for her. Success sometimes is easier, and far less damaging, when supports can be supplied earlier than later. I know, because I'm only just now researching and maneuvering the possible supports available to me. I wish I'd had them earlier in life, or at least had a diagnosis! Being different, and having no idea why, is extremely difficult and disheartening. Evelyn has us for support, and the knowledge of why she is so much like her mom, but more supports could prove to be a relief for her, if we can find ones that work.

Pardon the distraction (ADHD brain), back to the game day!

So, after finishing up the adventure, everyone leveled up their characters and decided what to do during a span of down-time. We then maneuvered most of that before everyone left to get back to their own mundane adventures. We did NOT finish with Evelyn, though, because her character has some complexities which are a bit more confusing to work through. Because of this, we also did not get through her down-time activities. One thing she said she wanted to do, was to obtain an item she had discussed with our previous DM (Geof). We placed this all on hold so Evelyn could get her bedtime chores done, and so Geof and I could ride Leila to get some ice cream.

We rode to the Hy-Vee on N 27th, because I decided I also wanted some fancy soda. We got our soda and the ice cream while I got irritated by people who can't tell 6 inches from 6 feet, then we rode home. I tried to tease Evelyn by saying we didn't get her ice cream, but I failed because she was in a different room. When Evelyn finally finished and got her ice cream, she found she did not like it. She informed us that it was disgusting. I guess we'll have to find some better cheap-crap ice cream for her next time, 'cause Blue Bunny is OUT!

We sent Evelyn to bed, then Geof and I chilled together and ate ice cream (the fancy Ben & Jerry's kind). While I ate my ice cream, I worked on Evelyn's new magic item. While Geof ate his, he read. We finished, then continued on our little projects, being together but doing different things. 

I finally finished Evelyn's magic item, though, which is the title of this blog. You can view it here: Stone of Returning

Good night, my friends, and fun sleepy-time, dreamy adventures! πŸ’›

Tuesday, September 15, 2020

A Walk in the Park

 After I got up today, I met Geof for lunch at Qdoba. I tried to catch him mid-way since he was walking, so I could take him the rest of the way on Leila, but he walked faster than I expected and I missed him, so we got to Qdoba at just about the same time. 

After lunch I took my leftovers home, got my art stuff together, and went to Pioneer's Park to draw. I worked on a commission I've been working on. I got a little done, but not as much as I had hoped. Figuring out the dimensions has been a bit more difficult than usual. I'll be posting photos in Patreon as I go, so if you're interested in seeing this or any other works in progress, you can check it out there! You can keep an eye on my gallery to see older works as they get posted.

I had to get Geof at 5:30, so I stopped and moseyed back to Leila for the ride home, since I had to put my art stuff away before getting Geof. After I picked up Geof, we got gas then returned home. Geof was very happy to work on his bicycle in hopes of finally having tubes in his tires that will stay filled. Evelyn was very excited to make waffles! 

The waffles were delicious, and now I have to get ready and go to work. Another late night. I'll be there again 'til 3 am.

Catch ya'll later!

The (mostly) Silent Dialogue

Body: *wakes up*
Me: *looks @ clock & sees it's almost 10 am.* "Why are we waking up @ 10?!? We didn't get to sleep till after 4:30 am!!"
Body: "We have to pee. Just get the fuck up & pee."
Me: "But we just peed @ 4am!!"
Body: "So? Get up & pee, bitch, or we're doing it right the fuck here!"
Me: *gets up to pee*
Body: *shivers in an uncontrollable, really tired way*
Me: *goes back to bed*
Boys (dogs): "We come?"
Me (actually speaking): "ugh... No! You play too much! If I let you in, you have to lay down."
Tucker: *starts laying down, then figures out I didn't really give a command & stops @ sitting, then continues to stare pleadingly*
Me (actually speaking): "ugh... Go lay down!"
Gotham: *grabs bone & goes to lay down in bedroom*
Tucker: *seems unsure & slightly dejectedly begins walking toward the kennel*
Me (actually speaking): "No, get back here."
Gotham: *brings bone to me*
Tucker: *turns around hopeful*
Me (actually speaking): "Drop it."
Gotham: *drops the bone*
Tucker: *continues hopeful look*
Me: *kicks bone out the door & closes it, careless of which boy is where & just needing to fucking sleep* 
Gotham: *looks @ bone longingly as door closes, then returns to bed*
Tucker: *looks sad as door closes*
Me: *climbs slowly into bed to lie down*
Gotham: "I'm coming too!"
Me (actually speaking): "No! Go away!" *listens as he goes away then continues getting into bed*
Me: "Ugh... go to sleep body!!"
Body: "It's not my fault, brain is keeping us awake."
Brain: *feels that Body is unnaturally heavy in limbs, hungry, randomly itchy. Starts hearing all the things, most especially phone noises* "please can we just get up & respond to noises from phone?"
Me: "No. Body is exhausted. Stop making sounds & music that aren't really happening, & no you don't need to look @ the phone, just go the fuck to sleep!"
Brain: *stays awake as long as possible trying to distract with all the things*
Body: *refuses to move except for weird itches & pains in odd places*
Brain: *finally gives in & starts dreaming instead*
Body: *sleeps*

-Alarm goes off @ noon-

Brain: "Yes! We get to do things again!"
Body: *refuses to move.* "We're not fucking awake, go away"

-News starts playing-

Brain: *gets distracted listening to news*
Body: *ever so slowly moves here & there, beginning to wake up.*

-News finishes playing-

Brain: "Can we get up now?"
Body: *barely awake* "I guess..."
Me (@ noon:50): "Fuck, we didn't take our meds yet."

Monday, September 14, 2020

The Slowasfucktrain

I didn't end up editing yesterday's blog. Geof couldn't remember what I did Thursday either. Except for working, I worked late that night. (Thursday I BLOGGED, seriously brain...what the fuck)<-updated 09-15-2020 @ 2:30 am.

And now TODAY! (9-14-2020) 

Let's see...today I woke up but didn't really get up and about initially. Convinced the dogs to chill with me. Tucker doesn't chill very well usually, but he managed after I kept shooing him from the bed every time he tried to bring the bone up there for chewing. I finally got up around noon-thirty (noon is my usual wake up time), took my meds, then took the dogs (heretofore referred to as "boys") outside (they were getting insistent). I decided I wanted to visit my friend, Nate, at Behind the Glass, (his comic book shop). I knew I might get chilly, so I pulled out a scarf. It was green, so I decided to dress to match and put on a green tank-top. I felt like a bit more decoration would be fun, so I put on yellow  and green eye liners and mixed hold with green hair gel for a lighter green and put it on one side of my head. When I was finished, I went downstairs and got mom to help ensure my line was straight, then I got myself together and left. I rode Leila (my motorcycle) over to the shop and chilled there for a couple hours. 


Geof got off work at 3 so I met him at home. The plan was to take his rims to the shop in an attempt to discover why his tubes keep going flat and to see if his rims are OK to use with tubeless tires. Then to either get tubeless installed or get new tubes so he could ride this evening with Evelyn. So I latched the rims onto Leila and we rode to Scheels. Once there, we found out the rims probably weren't tubeless ready and that due to Covid, they didn't have any tubes in his size and shipment of tubes  was delayed. So we latched the rims back onto Leila and returned home. At home, I told Geof he could use my bicycle to ride with Evelyn, so he started getting bikes ready while I went to pick up Evelyn from her Dad's. 

Once home, Geof and Evelyn set out for their ride and I chilled a bit, received a package delivery, took it inside to give to mom, then got some dinner (leftovers from last night's dinner). I finished eating, grabbed bike tools that Geof asked for, then headed out to meet them at a little ice cream shop. I beat them there and discovered the shop was closed. Terribly disappointing. I wanted ice cream... Finally Geof and Ev arrived, made slight adjustments, then we all headed home.

I knew they weren't going to make it back before it got dark, so I gathered the bicycle headlights and rode out to meet them along the trail.

-This is where the funny begins-

I parked Leila a block away and walked down the road, across railroad tracks, to wait at the bike trail. As soon as they arrived, I gave Evelyn my helmet to hold and attached her light. As I was finishing, I saw a train coming slowly down the tracks, so I left and ran as fast as I could to beat the slowasfucktrain so I wouldn't have to wait for the slowasfucktrain before going home. The moment I cheered myself for beating the slowasfucktrain, I realized my helmet was in Evelyn's hands...on the other side of the slowasfucktrain. So I sat down and waited for the slowasfucktrain so I could retrieve my helmet. As soon as the slowasfucktrain passed, I walked back over, assisted Geof with his bike light because he couldn't get it figured out, then moseyed back to Leila. Why brain?!? Why must you be so impulsive?!?!!!

-Funny over, sadness-

Once home, I took the boys out, watched Geof and Evelyn arrive home, then started prepping for work. So here I am now! At work. Until 3 am. Yay. 

I now bid you adieu, until tomorrow, probably. πŸ’›πŸ’›

Sunday, September 13, 2020

Finger Babbling Should Be a Thing

 I haven't posted for a few days, so I decided I should now. I don't know what to post, so I'm just going to babble until something comes out of it that I like, then I'll edit until I think it's readable and makes a little sense. As a side note, finger babbling should be a thing...

Let's see, on the 10th, I have no idea what I did. I'll update when Geof reminds me later. (OMG I just noticed I already blogged on this day!! -it's the 15th at 2:30 am, go figure...)

On the 11th, I did exactly nothing until the very end of the day (after 9 pm) when I finally got up (with Geof's assistance), shaved Geof's head and buzzed my hair back down to a tactilely pleasing length. Then I took a bath. Why did I do nothing? It's a difficult question to answer. I felt incapable of doing. I was mentally exhausted. I don't know why. I don't know where it came from, or why I finally moved when Geof helped me up. Thinking about it makes me want to cry because it makes me feel like a failure somehow. It probably had something to do with ADHD. I learn something new about ADHD every day, I think. Maybe it has something to do with the ADHD meds I'm on. I wish I knew more. It's extremely frustrating to know nothing about one's self.

On the 12th, I got up right when my alarm went off (5 am) and started getting ready for work. I rode my motorcycle to work (Crete, NE), because I could and duh, it's a motorcycle... I was scheduled to work from 7 am - 9:30 pm. At 3 pm, someone came in to make up some hours, so I was gifted the opportunity to stop working early. I then began a really fun trip to surprise Geof! I knew he was on his way to ride the Oak Creek Trail. I saw him on my map (we share location with each other), and he was nearly there already when I set out. I stopped at every other turn, or so, to check messages (so he wouldn't suspect anything, and so I knew at what step he was on his adventure). I booked it the last leg of my trip in hopes of catching him before he started out. It was my luck that he had a flat tire just when he arrived and had to take the time to change it. And even MORE luck for me, that he couldn't figure out his new mini pump! I made it just as he was starting out and I honked, and he looked, and I waved, and he got the biggest smile on his face! I live for that smile. It's my favorite.

AND today, copy and paste my morning routine from yesterday, EXCEPT: I was tired and didn't want to get up and waited like five minutes before finally moving and when I finally moved I sat in the bathroom, on the toilet, doing nothing for like 25 minutes, until my third alarm went off and I decided I should finally get dressed for work. BUT I didn't have to get lunch or breakfast ready cuz it was already at work from yesterday because I had planned to work allfuckingdaylong but didn't have to because of the awesomeness I wrote about a moment ago, so I actually ended up riding out earlier than yesterday, which was a good thing because it was FUCKINGCOLDASHELL this morning. Colder than yesterday morning. So I rode slower to keep my fingers from turning black or literally falling off, and kept reaching them down to the engine to warm them. I arrived to work extremely tense from the cold. My body is still tired from that, and probably from whatever made me tired this morning. Maybe I'll fall asleep at a decent hour tonight? Or, like some nights, maybe I'll end up napping when I get home and be up till like 4 am...who knows. 

ALSO today, Geof couldn't get the photos inserted into his blog the way he wanted because they were too big, so I had him send them to me in messenger (they came as links..weird), then I copied them, pasted them into the conversation and sent them back to him. He was still not able, for whatever reason, to get them in, so I re-downloaded them and inserted them from my side and it worked. THEN I tried to save, but wasn't sure it had saved because Geof refreshed and didn't see them, so I had to convince him to close out of the editor so I could save and he'd be able to see the changes, but it took fucking forever to convince him for idk why. Maybe I need to teach him how it works...? ANYWAY, I finally got him to close it out, I saved, and they showed up, and he's going to finish his post after gaming. He plays Dungeons & Dragons on Sundays with his gaming group. 

Now I'm waiting for my parents to bring me a chocolate shake from DQ because they offered me a snack since they happened to be in Crete today, and Geof is planning for us to ride to a little ice cream shoppe that just re-opened after having been destroyed by a tornado last year or the year before. He, of course, will ride his bicycle, and I will ride my motorcycle. He told me the ice cream was an excuse to take out the new tire tubes for a spin, but I think taking out the new tubes is really his excuse to go get ice cream. Alright, I have stuff I have to do now. So I'll catch up with ya'll later when it's time for me to update this post with whateverthefuckIdidonThursday.

Thursday, September 10, 2020

Niobrara River Trip: mapping the bicycle route.

I got up at about noon today (didn't sleep well last night). Spent most of today just mapping out the bicycle routes for each day of our Niobrara River trip, which we're planning for next year. Skipped the first and last days because we need to drive the roads and figure out what route Geof wants to take from Lincoln to David City (after further discussion it's possible we'll skip that part anyway).

We're still working out the planning, but as of right now it's going to be a 9 day trip, total. Geof will be riding his bicycle and I'll be riding my motorcycle. Hopefully it will be a relaxing adventure. Once we're at our destination, we'll kayak the Niobrara River. I'm very excited for that part in particular!

Now it's time to go shopping. I need to replenish my stock of rice crispy treats. And probably get some more Naked. Geof will handle the boring stuff πŸ˜‚.

Wednesday, September 9, 2020


So, I've been trying to get Geof to start his side of this Blog so the link in my posts will lead to actual content (I have patience issues...).

Here is our most recent conversation:

This, folks, is why it's a constant adventure πŸ˜‚.

(I wonder what he'll come up with next...?)

Tuesday, September 8, 2020

Welcome to the Adventure

I am Christa RenΓ©. Geof and I decided to create this parallel blog to chronicle our adventures. We have adventures every day. Our adventures are often hilarious, at least to us; sometimes mundane, because we're boring and poor; occasionally sad, because life; and rarely angry, we will try to spare you from the most terrible with extreme vagueness, most likely. One thing you can count on: always the stories will be true-to-life and honest (At least on my side, cuz I'm better at not caring what people think - sorry in advance for the cussing that will fill this blog, I'm not really sorry). 

There may be days when one, both or neither of us write, but we shall attempt to chronicle as often as possible, even when our adventures are the mundane of shopping and Netflix with ice cream. 

And now, I'd like to officially welcome you to this parallel blog, Moto-Cycling is Pawsible (Us): the adventures of a motorcycling artist and her baseball nut cyclist! <-fake name because it's funny and true.

The parallel to this blog can be found at pawsible-moto-cycling-he.blogspot.com